i don't have much of a social life back in the states. i don't play video games. i don't watch very much television. when i do watch television, i'm either eating or hanging 10 on the internet, which is pretty much the only thing i do when i finally get home until my dog insists it's time to play again. since i spent quite a lot of my time on there, i've found a few things to simplify the whole affair.
google reader is definitely a good resource, and i'm stuck relying on it at work. it allows me to skim through the high-volume sites during the day so i'm not speed-reading every night just to get to bed on time.
the real money maker, though, is netvibes. with netvibes i can collect up all my feeds, including podcasts and even email, organize them according to their content/type/flavour into different tabs, and then either view the rss content (text, lite pics/vids) or pop open the article into a whole new window or tab.
after realizing that i had some content that i never read, and some that i did but didn't seem worth it, i decided to clean things up a bit. the only problem seems to be with my impending career change, i decided to go exploring on the internet, and now my netvibes page has swollen in size. i'm worse off now than when i started. i now have 9 tabs of content, whereas i had 7 before, one of which i didn't even check over here. my crossfit tab is ridonkulous, and it's bleeding out onto other tabs. i scope out 21 crossfit feeds, not including the two on the physical therapy tab (one of my new tabs) and 4 on the "solopsist" tab.
not only that, i've got 23 news feeds spread out across 3 tabs along with 2 podcasts. on the humor page, i've slid in fail blog, lolcats and some nerd comics, along with the ubiquitous onion. i read 75-90% of this content, every day. thank god videos are blocked, as that keeps me from watching two hulu streams, one of the podcasts and a good chunk of content from reason.
i am going to need a droid when i get home, because there is no way i can afford to spend 3 hours every night sitting in front of a computer. i've pretty much given up on trying to learn much more dari or pashtu, let alone reading the majority of the 20 or so books i have up on my shelf.
anyhoo, i'm not complaining that much, because i get to read good stuff every day.
first up, from the ever-excellent blog free range international comes more spot-on analysis. it's amazing what a man can do with intelligence, common sense and a moral calling to do seriously hard work the right way. it's depressing reading his thoughts as he watches us spoil it all over here, but i'm a born cynic so i enjoy that sort of thing. the world needs more men like him. reading his article reminded me that i need to keep researching kiva.
kiva is a different kind of charity, in that it's not charity at all. kiva connects lenders (i.e.: you and me) with entrepreneurs all around the world who are looking for a small loan to improve their business and their lives. it's not an intergovernmental 'aid package' that will merely be disbursed among the country's political elite and it's not some elaborate and expensive project that, at best, will marginally increase the quality of life for a small portion of an impoverished nation that won't be able to build on those gains anyway.
you are loaning your money to a name, to a face. you read their story and decide whether or not you feel like investing in that person. loans are as small as $25, and so far it appears repayment rates hover just above 98%. i'm going to keep looking into it, but i've heard that these micro-finance institutions have done a lot to spread development into the lower-class areas in india. the best part is you get your money back, so you can keep on lending while reserving your charity for strippers named charity. win-win!
but sometimes i read stuff that really grinds my gears. usually, it's radley balko that makes me want to yell at my computer, but today it's the folks at popehat: leash your policeman, it's the least you can do. this is, if you haven't figured it out already, a story about a cop shooting a dog. this happens a lot, which you would know if you recognized 'radley balko.' perhaps i'm a bit sensitive because the first dog that was really 'my dog' was put down by my father after a combination of my brother's puzzling incompetence around animals, despite having grown up on a farm, and my step-family's hypochondria in all things. plus, i've got a scary-looking dog back in the states, if you haven't interacted with him for more than a second. i guess an exception would be if you're an asian tourist. it will take me carrying my dog past you, lest he sniff you and beg to be petted, and mocking your terrified screams at the horrifying sight of a domesticated animal on a wilderness trail in ALASKA.
here are my thoughts on dogs: humans have evolved to become the apex predator of all of Earth. if you are scared of a dog, a breed we domesticated from wolves millenia ago (how badass did we used to be?), you've come a long way back down the totem pole and could use the healthy motivation that a mauling would provide.
most dogs are harmless EVEN IF THEY ARE ACTING AGGRESSIVELY. there are numerous breeds of dogs, a substantial amount of which were useful, and still are, as guard dogs. they vocalize and posture when an unknown entity is on or near their turf. they will almost always back down when approached directly. being scared and running away is inviting further aggression, as it triggers a predator instinct in dogs.
some dogs, like the australian sheppard i used to have, are herding dogs. they have been bred to herd large animals. part of their resume is nipping at the heels of these animals to direct them where they ought to be running. even if they bite you, they are not attacking you. there is a huge difference between a nip and a bite.
there is a huge difference between a happy/inquisitive dog and an angry dog when they are running towards you. if you've spent a marginal amount of time around dogs, then you know the difference. if you haven't, go to a dog park. take your kids.
oh, and that reminds me, kids need to learn this stuff early. dogs telegraph their attitudes in ways children should be able to pick up. take your kids to the dog park, keep them close, but let them interact. then take them to somebody's house who has an aggressive dog and show them the difference.
finally, most importantly, if you actually are getting attacked: remain calm and keep your forearm horizontally in front of you between your neck and the dog. it's not a particularly vital part of you, you can club the dog with it if it goes low, and you can absorb an impact if the dog goes high for it, then turn and drive the dog down to the ground, pinning it beneath you. most human weigh more than a dog, so it's a fairly simple matter to take a bite or two before subduing the thing. then you can get another human to help you remind the dog that humans are the apex predator.
when approaching aggressive dogs, i offer my forearm as i close the distance and talk to them soothingly but confidently. as i get close, if they act as if they're cornered, i'll stop. if not, i'll look slightly away (eye contact intimidates dogs), crouch slightly, and slide my hand out, palm down, for them to get a better smell and get acquainted a bit. if they let me make contact, i'll briefly scratch near their chest or along their flank. they prefer their chest but that leaves me more vulnerable than i care to be.
now, if you are an armed policeman and you think it's acceptable to shoot a dog that is approaching you just because you think it's a threat, you are a giant pussy. you do not exhibit the kind of judgement that would make it permissible for you to own firearms, let alone employ them professionally. and if you shoot my dog, i'm likely to make sure your heartbeat stops before my dog's does.
i may be a nerd, but i'm also an old school man with a loyal dog. and unlike the army, our loyalty runs both ways.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Thursday, December 9, 2010
hear hear
we need more men like the honorable robert gates.
Every new year is supposed to be an occasion for new hope, but 2011 hasn't even begun and already there is cause for regret. Defense Secretary Robert Gates is planning to step down next year, and his departure will leave the capital even more short of the kind of people it needs: grownups.
i just hope he goes down swinging.
target list:
amphibious tank for the marines
joint strike fighter v/stol variant
and how about a cap on the number of general officers, set a healthy amount below the current level?
give consideration to eliminating theater commands with the exception of northcom and removal of all combat units from europe within 5-10 years, korea in 10-20 years. DoS should be resourced for international diplomacy, not the military. extend the career timeline of all active-duty officers by two years and mandate overseas tours in an embedded liaison or training position with other countries to build relationships and provide international perspective to all officers, preferably during the captain/major timeframe.
the military needs more tooth, less tail, and a lot less overhead.
Every new year is supposed to be an occasion for new hope, but 2011 hasn't even begun and already there is cause for regret. Defense Secretary Robert Gates is planning to step down next year, and his departure will leave the capital even more short of the kind of people it needs: grownups.
i just hope he goes down swinging.
target list:
amphibious tank for the marines
joint strike fighter v/stol variant
and how about a cap on the number of general officers, set a healthy amount below the current level?
give consideration to eliminating theater commands with the exception of northcom and removal of all combat units from europe within 5-10 years, korea in 10-20 years. DoS should be resourced for international diplomacy, not the military. extend the career timeline of all active-duty officers by two years and mandate overseas tours in an embedded liaison or training position with other countries to build relationships and provide international perspective to all officers, preferably during the captain/major timeframe.
the military needs more tooth, less tail, and a lot less overhead.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
this reminds me....
... of the guys who were in the army during the downsizing, hating on clinton because they had to bring their own paper and pens to work because they couldn't get them from supply. it wasn't the politicians making them do it, it was the services themselves sacrificing the ability of their units to function so they could protect their pet projects and irrelevant commands.
guess what? withholding paper and pens makes you look petty when you drive around in six figure MRAPs with remote controlled guns.
how about we try to make combat units independent and self-sufficient first? i'm not talking about contractors. i'm talking about the iron eagle brigade in kabul.
guess what? withholding paper and pens makes you look petty when you drive around in six figure MRAPs with remote controlled guns.
how about we try to make combat units independent and self-sufficient first? i'm not talking about contractors. i'm talking about the iron eagle brigade in kabul.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
an epicurean cynic
so i'm a bit optimistic lately. perhaps it's just my own little personal echo chamber, but i'm starting to see a little more informed cynicism out there. it's pretty tough to win a war when you commute to the fight. it's even harder to win it when you don't even commute. there are probably more staff officers running the PowerPoint assembly line in country losing this war than NCOs and junior officers outside the wire trying to win it. first up in the 'makes me happy because it makes me sad' list, we've got the economist weighing in. here's the moneyshot:
What can America do about Afghanistan besides spend money on it? What possible American solution to Afghanistan's problems (as we perceive them, anyway) could involve not spending over four times the country's GDP? Who can we send to do agricultural extension work in Afghan villages besides American agricultural experts, at decent American salaries (80 times Afghan salaries) plus hazard pay? How can we ensure their safety, except by hiring American security companies on hundred-million-dollar contracts? When those security companies use Afghan subcontractors, how hard a bargain can we really expect them to drive to keep Afghan militia salaries down? How can we expect that the Afghans will refrain from doing the obvious, by concluding deals with the enemy to attack in order to increase demand for their services, then to hold off to demonstrate the value of those services? What did we expect would happen to Kabul, when we started sponsoring its government, but that it would turn into Saigon: Tokyo-level rents for villas with working internet but no working showers, New York-level prices for gym memberships for Western consultants, private militias more reliable than government troops, the RPGs going off within hearing distance of the central city?
First off, we could push almost all spending to battalions and below. Only the maneuver units that actually go outside and interact with the locals get to know them well enough to have a good idea where to put their money. Units this size wouldn't dream of starting some ridiculous grand project that just isn't feasible in a country where bringing together a skilled workforce, quality materials and efficient project management is a herculean task. A road is feasible, a hydroelectric powerplant and electrical grid is not. To save both money and manpower we could give them a budget and let them manage it and remove the ridiculous bureaucracy we've emplaced for managing money. Which reminds me.... overhead is killing us. If you can't afford to lose a staff officer for a few months to fill an open leadership billet, chances are you ARE losing.
Anyway, enough of that. All the projects in the world aren't going to win the war. The people of Afghanistan are tough, resourceful people, and they'll learn how to thrive if we would stop messing things up. The thing we need to focus on is killing and marginalizing al Qaeda and the Taliban. They have names. They have places they live, places they train. If it's over the border, then shut down the border. Do what needs to be done to pull the logistics tail out from Pakistan. Watch how fast Pakistan rights the ship when they realize they are accountable to their people for support, not foreign money and influence peddling. I know, I'm sound like Herschel Smith here, but if we pull this out it will be because the Marines show us the way. If only they could give up that silly floating tank.
But anyway, on to brighter things. I have a bit of a revelation in the past few years since all my dreams came tumbling back down to Earth. I've decided to live a more epicurean life. Who knew that it could be so good for you? I spent so much of the past 15 years with my head down, grinding out the miles, that I missed the view along the way. So I want to dedicate my free time to pleasure, to having fun. I have to say that this past year has been the best one of my life. I've made some many incredible friends and lived through epic adventures that most will never experience. I dislike my job, but I'm at peace with it. I enjoy the good people around me and I get to laugh at the idiots, too. I enjoy killing myself in the gym more than ever, and I'm pretty sure I've had more results in the past year than the past 10 combined. When I get back I've got a dozen hobbies I want to pick up and try not to suck at. And I have the coolest, most awesome dog ever. Shit, I may even get to fly again....
- transplants - i want it all -
p.s.: apparently i was so happy i started capitalizing again.
What can America do about Afghanistan besides spend money on it? What possible American solution to Afghanistan's problems (as we perceive them, anyway) could involve not spending over four times the country's GDP? Who can we send to do agricultural extension work in Afghan villages besides American agricultural experts, at decent American salaries (80 times Afghan salaries) plus hazard pay? How can we ensure their safety, except by hiring American security companies on hundred-million-dollar contracts? When those security companies use Afghan subcontractors, how hard a bargain can we really expect them to drive to keep Afghan militia salaries down? How can we expect that the Afghans will refrain from doing the obvious, by concluding deals with the enemy to attack in order to increase demand for their services, then to hold off to demonstrate the value of those services? What did we expect would happen to Kabul, when we started sponsoring its government, but that it would turn into Saigon: Tokyo-level rents for villas with working internet but no working showers, New York-level prices for gym memberships for Western consultants, private militias more reliable than government troops, the RPGs going off within hearing distance of the central city?
First off, we could push almost all spending to battalions and below. Only the maneuver units that actually go outside and interact with the locals get to know them well enough to have a good idea where to put their money. Units this size wouldn't dream of starting some ridiculous grand project that just isn't feasible in a country where bringing together a skilled workforce, quality materials and efficient project management is a herculean task. A road is feasible, a hydroelectric powerplant and electrical grid is not. To save both money and manpower we could give them a budget and let them manage it and remove the ridiculous bureaucracy we've emplaced for managing money. Which reminds me.... overhead is killing us. If you can't afford to lose a staff officer for a few months to fill an open leadership billet, chances are you ARE losing.
Anyway, enough of that. All the projects in the world aren't going to win the war. The people of Afghanistan are tough, resourceful people, and they'll learn how to thrive if we would stop messing things up. The thing we need to focus on is killing and marginalizing al Qaeda and the Taliban. They have names. They have places they live, places they train. If it's over the border, then shut down the border. Do what needs to be done to pull the logistics tail out from Pakistan. Watch how fast Pakistan rights the ship when they realize they are accountable to their people for support, not foreign money and influence peddling. I know, I'm sound like Herschel Smith here, but if we pull this out it will be because the Marines show us the way. If only they could give up that silly floating tank.
But anyway, on to brighter things. I have a bit of a revelation in the past few years since all my dreams came tumbling back down to Earth. I've decided to live a more epicurean life. Who knew that it could be so good for you? I spent so much of the past 15 years with my head down, grinding out the miles, that I missed the view along the way. So I want to dedicate my free time to pleasure, to having fun. I have to say that this past year has been the best one of my life. I've made some many incredible friends and lived through epic adventures that most will never experience. I dislike my job, but I'm at peace with it. I enjoy the good people around me and I get to laugh at the idiots, too. I enjoy killing myself in the gym more than ever, and I'm pretty sure I've had more results in the past year than the past 10 combined. When I get back I've got a dozen hobbies I want to pick up and try not to suck at. And I have the coolest, most awesome dog ever. Shit, I may even get to fly again....
- transplants - i want it all -
p.s.: apparently i was so happy i started capitalizing again.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
i needed this...
... even though eliot spitzer is a grade A cock goblin. i loved jefferson's demonic eyes. america's founding fathers, now they knew how to insult somebody. wordsmiths and visionaries all.
now onto why i've been delinquent in my posting.
my small victories are getting smaller and smaller. it's amazing how little it takes to make me happy sometimes. but i'm not happy, and haven't been for years, which gets pretty depressing. the past few years has seen me constantly lower my expectations for what i want out of life and not getting any return on my investment. at the same time, i've slowly become more sure of who i am, and less willing to change. i'm pretty sure when that moment finally comes when i might have what my younger self would've wanted, my current self just won't care.
enough emo meta bullshit. even i'm getting put off by this crap. all i used to want was a challenging, rewarding job and a loving, beautiful wife. now all i want to do is play with my dog and fuck off.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
unfinished
well, i was going to take the time to develop some thoughts on this and this, but i think i'll keep it short today.
on the matter of jacob weisberg once again hyperventilating into the crumpled paper bag that is slate's reading audience about the libertarian menace:
if you could remove the rose-tinted glasses that you progressives always wear, you would see that mr. theil is a prime example of all that's RIGHT with capitalism and that all those federal dollars have turned american public education into a welfare queen. you've already embarrassed yourself twice. shut the fuck up and color. if i wanted to read an incoherent liberal's bellyaching, i'd listen to jello biafra. at least i'd enjoy the background noise.
i was going to say my piece on the kill team, but i'm not too pleased with how it turned out, and once again, josh pretty much says it all.
sorry i don't have more, but i just came across the best fitness website since 70s big dot com.
seriously, what manner of genius is this? i was pretty stoked about getting nailed with a cold and still managing to get a few lifts in and destroy the skipper's punishment. i've even been mobilizing a little bit and getting prepped to start putting a few miles on my suddenly heftier frame. shit, i even got my muscle-ups back.
and then this....
...soo.... i guess it's back to the grindstone tomorrow. gotta keep my head on straight and give it my best shot. and then take some time and keep destroying shit in the gym. i know my running and metcon probably sucks right now, but if i keep this up i'm gonna have a gnarly strength base to build off of when the time comes. and everybody knows that strong people are harder to kill and generally more useful.
now, time to scope out hot chicks lifting weights.... gorilla style
- stone sour - unfinished -
on the matter of jacob weisberg once again hyperventilating into the crumpled paper bag that is slate's reading audience about the libertarian menace:
if you could remove the rose-tinted glasses that you progressives always wear, you would see that mr. theil is a prime example of all that's RIGHT with capitalism and that all those federal dollars have turned american public education into a welfare queen. you've already embarrassed yourself twice. shut the fuck up and color. if i wanted to read an incoherent liberal's bellyaching, i'd listen to jello biafra. at least i'd enjoy the background noise.
i was going to say my piece on the kill team, but i'm not too pleased with how it turned out, and once again, josh pretty much says it all.
sorry i don't have more, but i just came across the best fitness website since 70s big dot com.
seriously, what manner of genius is this? i was pretty stoked about getting nailed with a cold and still managing to get a few lifts in and destroy the skipper's punishment. i've even been mobilizing a little bit and getting prepped to start putting a few miles on my suddenly heftier frame. shit, i even got my muscle-ups back.
and then this....
 |
| These navvies are so much harder than you, you might as well be looking at a pack of velociraptors. |
...soo.... i guess it's back to the grindstone tomorrow. gotta keep my head on straight and give it my best shot. and then take some time and keep destroying shit in the gym. i know my running and metcon probably sucks right now, but if i keep this up i'm gonna have a gnarly strength base to build off of when the time comes. and everybody knows that strong people are harder to kill and generally more useful.
now, time to scope out hot chicks lifting weights.... gorilla style
- stone sour - unfinished -
Monday, September 27, 2010
buzzin'
The Bad Seeds - I'm A King Bee
time is flying by. finally got some professional help up at our hub. getting things wired in tight.
got my rings up. been pulling solid weights. 5x5s have been 305 lbs for squat, 410 deadlift, and 195 for thrusters. managing to hold my ground on running. that'll probably be my 2nd half focus. hopefully the new gym will be up by then, and hopefully i can get around the normal procedures and get some good shit for the gym instead of weak ass machines.
been researching life after the army, and what i'm gonna do. things look promising. i'll need to dial it in quite a bit, but i think i'm heading in the right direction. hopefully i can find a good place for me and my puppy in cali. and hopefully i can drag out my alaska registration, cause lord knows my truck won't pass california emissions.
i did, however, get stung yesterday, whilst drilling holes for the aforementioned rings on top of a commo tower. not cool, but that's what i get for being a hippie and trying to live and let live with wasps. i then went on a killin' rampage. 'cause i'm a king bee, baby.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
hater aid
man, it's been a crazy week of hatin'.
first off, keeping with the recent theme of acquigistics, it seems that starbuck has stumbled upon some bloat in the Army's Materiel Command. Here's the salient point: "AMC also has more contractors and DoD civilians in its ranks than there are US service members in Afghanistan."
seems like there sure are a hell of a lot of suits running around this man's army. but, hey, they're here to help us do all the fightin' and winnin', right? so how's that fightin' and winnin' going? let's ask babatim over at free range international.
looks like he was gonna read the afghan study group report, but there wasn't much left after joshua foust flat out demolished it. somebody needs to institute the mercy rule here. i'm sorry justin logan, normally we're on the same team, but you're making me wince.
but enough about registan, the graveyard of afghanistan policy protagonists. what's tim have to say about the "granular" stuff. looks like he's picked up on an article i read with interest in the danger room. you can read the story, or you could just compare and contrast these pictures:
 | ||||||
| Captain Christian Balan, who teaches digital forensics at Burlington’s Champlain College in civilian life, heading towards a school just outside the massive Bagram airbase to trade his tech skills fixing the computer lab in hopes of generating good will and cooperation. Photo by Spencer Ackerman of the Danger Room blog. Caption totally cribbed from FRI, but I fixed your name, Attackerman. |
...VERSUS...
 |
| My son Logan doing the heavy lifting during the initial instal of the Jalalabad Fab Fi network. |
| *stolen caption alert* |
uh.... Infantry squad + Commo CPT + Interpreter < Grad Students Gone Wild.
now it's been a while since i had discrete dynamical systems, but even if you start with initial condition of 'that dude's dad is legit,' you still have to take into account we're 9 years into this thing and we're venturing outside the wire into the town next door like the Marines from avatar. (I had to google that, that's how out of the whole movie scene I am.)
ok, so maybe we need to strip out a lot of the bullshit and let your Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen and Marines do what they do best, like tim says. incidentally, i doubt ANYONE has the stomach for what would happen next, but if we're honestly planning on getting a democracy up and running through security and development and keeping the place from becoming a safe haven from aq and the taliban, then that's the only solution i see. otherrwise all we're doing is biding our time until it's politically feasible to pull out and hoping that the place doesn't go to hell in a handbasket.
but, back to acquigistics, we can't possibly outfit our troops with the finest in military hardware without this hot mess, can we? well, lo and behold it's a shimmering gleam of light coming from the bowels of the beast. It's rogue project leader, and he's gonna be FISTing the establishment like nobody's business. hey, that's FIST as in "fast, inexpensive, simple and tiny" weapons systems. you're nasty, which i like.
and guess what? he's even got cartoons!
and i loves me some smarmy cartoons. now if only i didn't have to go digging through the trash to find his toons. seriously, do we have to destroy all that is fun?
hmmm...? what's that? did somebody just say something about crossfit? Well, I'm gonna go ahead and take on the CHAMP. the Consortium for Health and Military Performance, that is.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
manned/unmanned squadron
from defense news:
Next year, the U.S. Army will create an experimental air cavalry squadron composed of 21 OH-58D Kiowa Warrior helicopters and eight RQ-7 Shadow UAVs.
The Army hopes that the new arrangement will allow the service to meet the exponentially increased demand for aerial reconnaissance with fewer forces over larger areas more efficiently.
"Unmanned aircraft have endurance and range, whereas manned aircraft have the ability to react to contacts and have better situational awareness," said Ellis Golson, director of the Army Aviation Center of Excellence's Capability Development and Integration Directorate. "We know it will work. It's just a matter of how well it will work and how we can make it even better."
cynical take: we're too incompetent to buy a new scout helicopter.
it's actually a good idea, and worth pursuing, even if we had managed to procure our heads out of our ass.
if we can ever manage to send units outside the wire for more than a quick road trip, the persistent surveillance will certainly be useful, first and foremost to the units on the ground, right where it should be. so kudos. hopefully this might reduce our risk aversion somewhat and let units get outside the wire longer than a fortymile hunting trip.*
* disclosure: of course i'm not one of those guys that's going outside the wire at all.
but that's why i don't think we should be treat all veterans and servicemembers the same. you were in the infantry in persistent close combat? you're my hero. seriously. i have nothing but love and respect for you guys. nothing we do as a nation can return that which you have given for us.
you spent your deployments hanging out at green bean, sneaking in a little minesweeper while fixing your powerpoint slides, and you won't shut up about your combat tours when you're in the states? shut up and color.
Next year, the U.S. Army will create an experimental air cavalry squadron composed of 21 OH-58D Kiowa Warrior helicopters and eight RQ-7 Shadow UAVs.
The Army hopes that the new arrangement will allow the service to meet the exponentially increased demand for aerial reconnaissance with fewer forces over larger areas more efficiently.
"Unmanned aircraft have endurance and range, whereas manned aircraft have the ability to react to contacts and have better situational awareness," said Ellis Golson, director of the Army Aviation Center of Excellence's Capability Development and Integration Directorate. "We know it will work. It's just a matter of how well it will work and how we can make it even better."
cynical take: we're too incompetent to buy a new scout helicopter.
it's actually a good idea, and worth pursuing, even if we had managed to procure our heads out of our ass.
if we can ever manage to send units outside the wire for more than a quick road trip, the persistent surveillance will certainly be useful, first and foremost to the units on the ground, right where it should be. so kudos. hopefully this might reduce our risk aversion somewhat and let units get outside the wire longer than a fortymile hunting trip.*
* disclosure: of course i'm not one of those guys that's going outside the wire at all.
but that's why i don't think we should be treat all veterans and servicemembers the same. you were in the infantry in persistent close combat? you're my hero. seriously. i have nothing but love and respect for you guys. nothing we do as a nation can return that which you have given for us.
you spent your deployments hanging out at green bean, sneaking in a little minesweeper while fixing your powerpoint slides, and you won't shut up about your combat tours when you're in the states? shut up and color.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
get up and dance
once again i'm feeling chipper. hopefully this monday doesn't end up like last monday did. but things are steadily improving, albeit slowly.
i got some awesome love from my frisbee folks. been meaning to catch up with them, and i finally got the nudge to do it. what a great group of peeps. chalu painj.
finally forced myself to start the rosetta stone lessons. doing farsi. only made it through two lessons, and i think i'm going to have to re-start it and take notes this time. i was a bit lost at the end there. that, and apparently there's an issue somewhere in the compulator. the speech recognition stuff isn't working. army internet stuff doesn't like firefox, apparently. or maybe just my computer. hopefully i'll get it going, but at least i'm doing something.
so i'm in a rather chipper mood. i probably shouldn't be, but hopefully i can keep it up. of course, i'm reading a lot of solemn posts and less solemn facebookery from friends on "patriot day." but my september 11th thoughts have been buoyed by this little discovery.
On the morning of 11th September 2001, the world discovered the unstoppable chain of events both you and al-Qaeda had put in place. Why was this operation carried out? What has the 11th September brought to the world except mass killings, occupations, destruction, hatred of Muslims, humiliation of Islam, and a tighter grip on the lives of ordinary Muslims by the authoritarian regimes that control Arab and Muslim states? I warned you then, in summer 2000, of how your actions would bring US forces into the Middle East and into Afghanistan, leading to mass unrest and loss of life. You believed I was wrong. Time has proved me right. Your actions have harmed millions of innocent Muslims and non-Muslims alike. How is this Islam or jihad? For how much longer will al-Qaeda continue to bring shame on Islam, disrupt ordinary Muslims' lives, and be the cause of global unrest?
damn, son, you got served! so who wrote that? how about "Noman Benotman, a former commander in the Libyan Islamic Fighting Group (LIFG) and a former associate of Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahiri."
game changer? probably not. but it's exactly the kind of thing that needs to happen. islam (speaking VERY broadly) is in a crisis of faith. moderate islam has yet to assert itself and repudiate the, shall we say, unsavory parts of the koran. it has yet to define what it is about the faith that offers something better in life. Of course, it is a cultural adhesive in regions steeped in history, but eventually religion has to offer a better life, not just a better afterlife. God would see through Pascal's wager.
of course, i don't believe in god. i'm just saying, God, if he existed, and were, you know... GOD, would be able to detect insincerity. i would also think he would look beyond faith itself and into your soul to know if you were, at heart, a decent human being.*
the koran, from what i've read, is a much less, erm, inspiring manuscript, than the other two judeo-christian texts (and i thought being a lutheran was rough!). but they all have their faults. faults which must either result in severe cognitive dissonance in believers, or severe ignorance. sure, religions have done a good job co-opting cultural traditions to provide deeper meaning behind such odd behaviors as hanging figurines on a pine tree near the winter solstice and hiding colored eggs. but in order to really thrive, religion has to offer something more, a reason for people to believe, a promise for the future. islam doesn't seem to me to offer much; over the past 9 years things have pretty much gone down the shitter.
but there are signs of hope. mr. benotman's words have really cheered me up. i hate to believe that it's true, but we won't walk away from afghanistan with anything to be proud of unless we win the narrative, and we don't control the narrative. we're outsiders, imposers. no matter how genuine we are and no matter who marginally competent we manage to be, we can not afford to stay in iraq or afghanistan forever. we will not have the luxury of even attempting to impose our will.
what follows in our wake will be determined by the collective will of the people. some areas will always be hostile to us, to our values, and they will continue to live in the shadows. whether they stay in the shadows, or whether they, or those they inspire, have the wherewithal to wantonly kill innocent, free people abroad, will be determined by those just outside of the shadows, those poor, struggling people of southwest and central asia who have been mired in poverty for far too long by wars and corrupt governments.
what will they do? will they turn to a faith that offers them more than the cold calculus of revenge and the sanctity of blood? will they turn to a faith that binds them to a code of decency and to a love of life and community? the future of islam will only be determined by its adherents. many blessings upon your house, mr. benotman. may many more like you come forward to reclaim your faith, for the sake of us all.
method of destruction - get up and dance
* in fact: i do think that. that's why i'm not sweating the wager. if i'm wrong, and god does exist, then he will surely judge me on the merits. if he judges me on whether i was sufficiently supplicant, then he's no god worth supplicating to.
i got some awesome love from my frisbee folks. been meaning to catch up with them, and i finally got the nudge to do it. what a great group of peeps. chalu painj.
finally forced myself to start the rosetta stone lessons. doing farsi. only made it through two lessons, and i think i'm going to have to re-start it and take notes this time. i was a bit lost at the end there. that, and apparently there's an issue somewhere in the compulator. the speech recognition stuff isn't working. army internet stuff doesn't like firefox, apparently. or maybe just my computer. hopefully i'll get it going, but at least i'm doing something.
so i'm in a rather chipper mood. i probably shouldn't be, but hopefully i can keep it up. of course, i'm reading a lot of solemn posts and less solemn facebookery from friends on "patriot day." but my september 11th thoughts have been buoyed by this little discovery.
On the morning of 11th September 2001, the world discovered the unstoppable chain of events both you and al-Qaeda had put in place. Why was this operation carried out? What has the 11th September brought to the world except mass killings, occupations, destruction, hatred of Muslims, humiliation of Islam, and a tighter grip on the lives of ordinary Muslims by the authoritarian regimes that control Arab and Muslim states? I warned you then, in summer 2000, of how your actions would bring US forces into the Middle East and into Afghanistan, leading to mass unrest and loss of life. You believed I was wrong. Time has proved me right. Your actions have harmed millions of innocent Muslims and non-Muslims alike. How is this Islam or jihad? For how much longer will al-Qaeda continue to bring shame on Islam, disrupt ordinary Muslims' lives, and be the cause of global unrest?
damn, son, you got served! so who wrote that? how about "Noman Benotman, a former commander in the Libyan Islamic Fighting Group (LIFG) and a former associate of Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahiri."
game changer? probably not. but it's exactly the kind of thing that needs to happen. islam (speaking VERY broadly) is in a crisis of faith. moderate islam has yet to assert itself and repudiate the, shall we say, unsavory parts of the koran. it has yet to define what it is about the faith that offers something better in life. Of course, it is a cultural adhesive in regions steeped in history, but eventually religion has to offer a better life, not just a better afterlife. God would see through Pascal's wager.
of course, i don't believe in god. i'm just saying, God, if he existed, and were, you know... GOD, would be able to detect insincerity. i would also think he would look beyond faith itself and into your soul to know if you were, at heart, a decent human being.*
the koran, from what i've read, is a much less, erm, inspiring manuscript, than the other two judeo-christian texts (and i thought being a lutheran was rough!). but they all have their faults. faults which must either result in severe cognitive dissonance in believers, or severe ignorance. sure, religions have done a good job co-opting cultural traditions to provide deeper meaning behind such odd behaviors as hanging figurines on a pine tree near the winter solstice and hiding colored eggs. but in order to really thrive, religion has to offer something more, a reason for people to believe, a promise for the future. islam doesn't seem to me to offer much; over the past 9 years things have pretty much gone down the shitter.
but there are signs of hope. mr. benotman's words have really cheered me up. i hate to believe that it's true, but we won't walk away from afghanistan with anything to be proud of unless we win the narrative, and we don't control the narrative. we're outsiders, imposers. no matter how genuine we are and no matter who marginally competent we manage to be, we can not afford to stay in iraq or afghanistan forever. we will not have the luxury of even attempting to impose our will.
what follows in our wake will be determined by the collective will of the people. some areas will always be hostile to us, to our values, and they will continue to live in the shadows. whether they stay in the shadows, or whether they, or those they inspire, have the wherewithal to wantonly kill innocent, free people abroad, will be determined by those just outside of the shadows, those poor, struggling people of southwest and central asia who have been mired in poverty for far too long by wars and corrupt governments.
what will they do? will they turn to a faith that offers them more than the cold calculus of revenge and the sanctity of blood? will they turn to a faith that binds them to a code of decency and to a love of life and community? the future of islam will only be determined by its adherents. many blessings upon your house, mr. benotman. may many more like you come forward to reclaim your faith, for the sake of us all.
method of destruction - get up and dance
* in fact: i do think that. that's why i'm not sweating the wager. if i'm wrong, and god does exist, then he will surely judge me on the merits. if he judges me on whether i was sufficiently supplicant, then he's no god worth supplicating to.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
dominos fall
i don't have much to say this week. i figured sunday would be a good day to have some meta time and post up in the paint of cyberspace, where all the dirty work gets done.
but no such luck. i'm not a very meta person. never have been. it seems the more i think ABOUT a problem, the more it bothers me and the more perplexing it seems. if i just attack it as a pragmatic concern i tend to handle things pretty well.
and lately, despite a lot of setbacks and hurdles to clear, it seems as if i'm finally starting to be able to handle my shit. thanks are due to a lot of people. this job isn't the sort where you can succeed on your own merits. you've gotta beg and borrow and venture a bit on the dark side to get shit done.
had an amusing conversation with my dad today. it wasn't amusing by itself. it was mainly amusing because it was more of a real conversation than most i have with my dad, with a lot of back and forth. it was amusing because it was about construction. there have been many days in the army when i've just wished that i had never bothered with college and worked for my dad instead. now look at what i'm up to....
of course i'm not really doing much in terms of laborin' or supervisin'. i do have to help out more than you'd expect. i don't know why, but they don't seem to ever have the right tools. it's pretty funny. kinda like i was as a high school kid trying to do a project and not having any of the right tools or realizing how much work would go into preparation. hopefully it turns out alright, but i have to stifle a laugh most times when i go check up on their work.
they're all really friendly, which is surprising considering that it's ramadan, and they can't drink all day. they get started very early and take off early, so that helps. their boss speaks a little bit of english, and he likes to talk. he likes to talk about family, so i get to talk about my dad and the farm. it's rather pleasant.
from what the main man tells me, i gather that my predecessors split up payments and all kinds of chicanery to get things done. i'm not known for complying with, let alone enforcing, stupid rules and regulations, but fraud isn't something i would like to get involved in. it's been pretty painful learning how things operate around here and trying to get stuff done. it's especially painful since i'm starting almost tabula rasa. it hasn't been fun.
but i'm starting to get my shit together, and it feels good. i'm going to be busy, that's for sure, but not overwhelmingly so. if i get things down, i'll be able to really attack a few things i really want to do. hint, hint: operation phoenix.
but there's quite a bit that's still up in the air. i still have no idea if i'm staying with my unit when i get back home or if they're gonna cut me loose. if i go, i have no idea what i'd be doing. i've pretty much given up trying to figure that out. no matter what happens, it won't be anything i ever wanted to do, that much i know. so i'm just gonna let the dominos fall.
all for tonite. it's too late, and i have to go shooting early tomorrow morning. and it's gonna be a BUSY one tomorrow.
- rancid - dominos fall
Sunday, August 29, 2010
nasty
i totally got called out this week, and i'm pretty stoked about it. so i'm gonna go ahead and return the favor. putting up a linky to the sweetest little honeypot of aural awesomeness your ears did ever behold.
modern rock is all about tight shirts, post-production and gelly-gelly hairdos. not that there's anything wrong with a little hair grease. breaking benjamin, this shit is not. it might be lo-fi, but it's that dirty surf stylin' oldies and garage... well, punk goodness. try NOT to leave it streaming all day, baby. not only does it have some sweet rare-ified airwaves, but some of the sweetest samples i've heard this side of spencer ackerman's flat. so go ahead... enter the garage.
feelin' nasty, too, 'cause i'm all torn up. got me a couple holes in my hands. a rusty barbell wedged into a tower with some wood and para cord is subbing in for a real pullup bar. which is to say, it is a REAL pullup bar. like the 8x8 timber like down at the farm. skin heals. gets tougher. and so do i. i'm almost 30 and i feel better than i did 10 years ago. like in everything. and i've got scabs and burns. i know why for some, and for others not so much. i almost feel like a man. which is nice, considering i've got an office job. somedays i just wanna be whiling out like lawrence sellin. but i'm not trapped behind the desk. i have a lot to learn, and the freedom to learn it. i don't really like my boss, but who ever does? at least i respect him this time.
and i gots me a nasty mouth now. been learning some sweet street dari, courtesy of a badass interpreter who needs to get himself a visa. and i'm feelin' so breezy in my shalwar kameezy. after ramadan, i'm gonna get the hookup with some sweet duds.
the mail is rollin' in, too. got my sweet new smith glasses. my keyboard is here, so for once i haven't had to re-type a single paragraph due to my gluttonous touchpad. i got a totally unexpected, and totally AWESOME package from my most random friend. and not just random 'cause she's awesomely random, humor-wise. how awesome? just when i'm trying to figure out where i'm gonna keep my benjamins, i get this:
the only bummer is that i got the wrong pipe in the mail. but i think i'm over my cravings for the leaf. i usually end up wanting a little lipper, particularly when i get the 5-to-9, but there are a number of ways to relieve stress. ripping up my hands is a pretty good one, so it's not been too bad. i'm just too lazy to keep smokin' the hookah. and i hate feeling like a cat shit in my mouth every morning after i have a cigar.
so i'm gonna get a straight pipe. i got time. gonna get me some black shalwar kameez. i already brought my fedora. rocking some tight smith glasses. get ready noz, cause i'm gonna be in it to win it come r&r time. i'm a bit banged up but feelin' good. if i keep hitting the iron, running the sprints and takin' the hill, i'm gonna be ready to give kane a run for his money when i get back.
now if only i could skype with my doggie, i'd be a happy man.
- the parents - you're hideous baby -
modern rock is all about tight shirts, post-production and gelly-gelly hairdos. not that there's anything wrong with a little hair grease. breaking benjamin, this shit is not. it might be lo-fi, but it's that dirty surf stylin' oldies and garage... well, punk goodness. try NOT to leave it streaming all day, baby. not only does it have some sweet rare-ified airwaves, but some of the sweetest samples i've heard this side of spencer ackerman's flat. so go ahead... enter the garage.
feelin' nasty, too, 'cause i'm all torn up. got me a couple holes in my hands. a rusty barbell wedged into a tower with some wood and para cord is subbing in for a real pullup bar. which is to say, it is a REAL pullup bar. like the 8x8 timber like down at the farm. skin heals. gets tougher. and so do i. i'm almost 30 and i feel better than i did 10 years ago. like in everything. and i've got scabs and burns. i know why for some, and for others not so much. i almost feel like a man. which is nice, considering i've got an office job. somedays i just wanna be whiling out like lawrence sellin. but i'm not trapped behind the desk. i have a lot to learn, and the freedom to learn it. i don't really like my boss, but who ever does? at least i respect him this time.
and i gots me a nasty mouth now. been learning some sweet street dari, courtesy of a badass interpreter who needs to get himself a visa. and i'm feelin' so breezy in my shalwar kameezy. after ramadan, i'm gonna get the hookup with some sweet duds.
the mail is rollin' in, too. got my sweet new smith glasses. my keyboard is here, so for once i haven't had to re-type a single paragraph due to my gluttonous touchpad. i got a totally unexpected, and totally AWESOME package from my most random friend. and not just random 'cause she's awesomely random, humor-wise. how awesome? just when i'm trying to figure out where i'm gonna keep my benjamins, i get this:
the only bummer is that i got the wrong pipe in the mail. but i think i'm over my cravings for the leaf. i usually end up wanting a little lipper, particularly when i get the 5-to-9, but there are a number of ways to relieve stress. ripping up my hands is a pretty good one, so it's not been too bad. i'm just too lazy to keep smokin' the hookah. and i hate feeling like a cat shit in my mouth every morning after i have a cigar.
so i'm gonna get a straight pipe. i got time. gonna get me some black shalwar kameez. i already brought my fedora. rocking some tight smith glasses. get ready noz, cause i'm gonna be in it to win it come r&r time. i'm a bit banged up but feelin' good. if i keep hitting the iron, running the sprints and takin' the hill, i'm gonna be ready to give kane a run for his money when i get back.
now if only i could skype with my doggie, i'd be a happy man.
- the parents - you're hideous baby -
Sunday, August 22, 2010
floods
it's somewhat odd, being so close to so many people in need, and it hardly affects me at all. i haven't the slightest idea what i could do. and my friends are getting themselves ready to fly halfway around the world to help. it's like fate is determined to crush my idealism. why have i spent the past 10 years of my life doing this? i haven't done a fucking thing worth telling my children about one day.
things around here are still churning along at the normal pace. even the slight changes that have happened hardly affect me at all. we have a cool mission, but while what i do is necessary for the proper functioning of the unit, i'm hardly part of the operations.
i've been talking to a few people lately that i haven't talked to in years. i don't really have much of an answer for what i've been up to all this time. it's weird. 5 years of my life have slipped by and i've barely noticed. i haven't really traveled. i haven't deployed. i haven't gone on any adventures, save a few this year.
i have no idea what's next. all i know is that i have 3 more years. 3 years. 1 year of this infuriatingly bureaucratic job. 2 more years of who knows what. i'm not even going to try to plan this one out. it's never worked out before, why would it now?
at least i have an awesome dog. and that's all i need.
listening to.... pantera - floods
maybe my dad was right about this kinda music.... or maybe i should pick another day than sunday night to post.
things around here are still churning along at the normal pace. even the slight changes that have happened hardly affect me at all. we have a cool mission, but while what i do is necessary for the proper functioning of the unit, i'm hardly part of the operations.
i've been talking to a few people lately that i haven't talked to in years. i don't really have much of an answer for what i've been up to all this time. it's weird. 5 years of my life have slipped by and i've barely noticed. i haven't really traveled. i haven't deployed. i haven't gone on any adventures, save a few this year.
i have no idea what's next. all i know is that i have 3 more years. 3 years. 1 year of this infuriatingly bureaucratic job. 2 more years of who knows what. i'm not even going to try to plan this one out. it's never worked out before, why would it now?
at least i have an awesome dog. and that's all i need.
listening to.... pantera - floods
maybe my dad was right about this kinda music.... or maybe i should pick another day than sunday night to post.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
feels good to be a punk loser
so i'm not planning on getting out because of the deployments. i spent 2 years bugging hrc to get me deployed. it's not even that the bullshit outweighs the benefits. it's the 'no future' thing. partly, it's because i believe in the peter principle, whereby in a large organization people are promoted to their level of incompetence. it doesn't help that i've been working outside my branch for the past several years. it also doesn't help that without some divine (i.e.: O-6) intervention, i'll be leaving my old unit when i finally get back. and that means i'll likely end up twiddling my thumbs for a while, wishing i was still operational while avoiding anything that would require more commitment than i can afford, which at this point, is none. i'm stuck in a netherworld between ranks where i'm not ready for the big boy jobs but too senior for the job i never got to have. and therein is the other reason why i'm leaving. i hate being managed according to a career timeline and to the code beside my name. i really wish i would've had more time as a junior guy. there's a lot to learn in the army, especially when you're in a technical field. it's nearly impossible to get the breadth of experience you really need to be an exceptional leader when you're lucky if you spend more than a few months in your job.
there should be the freedom to choose to spend more time learning the trade we're in. that means not only operational assignments, but broader ones as well. why should i have to choose between doing what i love, and already know i love, and something like af-pak hands, which is an exceptional idea (which acknowledges that we'll be here a LONG time, which is probably accurate), albeit not being very well executed, mostly because it's tough to get people to take that big step into the dark. there are plenty of people who wouldn't do it because it would hurt their career. what if it didn't end it, or change it, but instead was more of a scenic route, as it were.
it's getting late, and i can't quite wrap my thoughts on promotion and the increasing top-heaviness of the military.
what i can dish about, and why i ended up talking about all this crap, is that i think there's a related peter principle in effect in the military, and it relates to dorkiness. i'm used to taking shit for my appearance. i don't mind, especially when we're in a b.s. session. one the things i always loved about aviation was how much we make fun of each other. constantly.
but i can't help but notice is that the higher i look up the food chain, the fewer and fewer 'normal people' i see. now, i'm not normal. not by a long shot. there's a reason why this post has that title. shit, there's a reason i'm blogging past midnight when i could be looking at porn. there's nothing obviously abnormal about them, usually. they look kinda normal. they have normal interests and normal families.
but jesus, why does it seem like they all dress like they buy all their clothes from lands' end's clearance department? why do they all have haircuts that haven't been stylish since they were 7? it's like their cultural grounding cable came loose when they joined the military and over time they build up a static charge of dweebiness. and it gets really annoying getting zapped with it everytime they snicker about my crazy hair or my high socks any of the little things that makes me, ME. if you can't relate to someone in your own organization, who holds the same values as you just because i carry myself a little differently, then how are you going to be able to wrap your head around a different culture and be able to convince them of anything other than that you're just another faceless uniform?
this war is not 'hearts and minds.' we're not going to win unless we aggressively hunt down and kill the poison that is infecting this country. but this war isn't just about fighting. it's going to take a long time, and we're going to have to build a relationship with these people if we're going to avoid wearing out our welcome before the country is able to stand on it's own, let alone keep them from turning against us. we're going to have to convince the paks that it's in their interest to leave afghanistan alone, which is going to take a LOT of convincing. it's not money that's going to do it; the military will play a significant role in it. a lot of it will be out of our hands, to be sure. i wouldn't bet on us, if i were a gambling man.
we'd stand a better chance if we let our junior guys spend some more time learning both their trade and gaining new knowledge outside their field, cutting away the layers of bureaucracy and the attendant senior officers, non-comms, dod civilians and contractors that are soaking up time, money, and would be a lot less valuable if we slowed down a bit and let everyone become truly competent before moving them up the ladder. that, and some goddamned fashion sense. seriously.
no youtube anytime soon.
listening to.....
nailbomb
point blank
postscript: i think the coolest field grade i ever met was a lesbian lieutenant colonel. not that she had any sense of style (more like the clearance section of ll bean's mens' department). but she seemed capable of straddling two completely different worlds and managing to behave like a totally... normal person.
there should be the freedom to choose to spend more time learning the trade we're in. that means not only operational assignments, but broader ones as well. why should i have to choose between doing what i love, and already know i love, and something like af-pak hands, which is an exceptional idea (which acknowledges that we'll be here a LONG time, which is probably accurate), albeit not being very well executed, mostly because it's tough to get people to take that big step into the dark. there are plenty of people who wouldn't do it because it would hurt their career. what if it didn't end it, or change it, but instead was more of a scenic route, as it were.
it's getting late, and i can't quite wrap my thoughts on promotion and the increasing top-heaviness of the military.
what i can dish about, and why i ended up talking about all this crap, is that i think there's a related peter principle in effect in the military, and it relates to dorkiness. i'm used to taking shit for my appearance. i don't mind, especially when we're in a b.s. session. one the things i always loved about aviation was how much we make fun of each other. constantly.
but i can't help but notice is that the higher i look up the food chain, the fewer and fewer 'normal people' i see. now, i'm not normal. not by a long shot. there's a reason why this post has that title. shit, there's a reason i'm blogging past midnight when i could be looking at porn. there's nothing obviously abnormal about them, usually. they look kinda normal. they have normal interests and normal families.
but jesus, why does it seem like they all dress like they buy all their clothes from lands' end's clearance department? why do they all have haircuts that haven't been stylish since they were 7? it's like their cultural grounding cable came loose when they joined the military and over time they build up a static charge of dweebiness. and it gets really annoying getting zapped with it everytime they snicker about my crazy hair or my high socks any of the little things that makes me, ME. if you can't relate to someone in your own organization, who holds the same values as you just because i carry myself a little differently, then how are you going to be able to wrap your head around a different culture and be able to convince them of anything other than that you're just another faceless uniform?
this war is not 'hearts and minds.' we're not going to win unless we aggressively hunt down and kill the poison that is infecting this country. but this war isn't just about fighting. it's going to take a long time, and we're going to have to build a relationship with these people if we're going to avoid wearing out our welcome before the country is able to stand on it's own, let alone keep them from turning against us. we're going to have to convince the paks that it's in their interest to leave afghanistan alone, which is going to take a LOT of convincing. it's not money that's going to do it; the military will play a significant role in it. a lot of it will be out of our hands, to be sure. i wouldn't bet on us, if i were a gambling man.
we'd stand a better chance if we let our junior guys spend some more time learning both their trade and gaining new knowledge outside their field, cutting away the layers of bureaucracy and the attendant senior officers, non-comms, dod civilians and contractors that are soaking up time, money, and would be a lot less valuable if we slowed down a bit and let everyone become truly competent before moving them up the ladder. that, and some goddamned fashion sense. seriously.
no youtube anytime soon.
listening to.....
nailbomb
point blank
postscript: i think the coolest field grade i ever met was a lesbian lieutenant colonel. not that she had any sense of style (more like the clearance section of ll bean's mens' department). but she seemed capable of straddling two completely different worlds and managing to behave like a totally... normal person.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
mollycoddling
a word that a npr story reminded me that i loved. my friend, who is trying to do something valuable (not to mention, make enough money to pay the rent), is trying to get a research grant to work on resiliency training for combat veterans. in the article she sent me, the good doctor martin seligman name drops dr albert ellis, who founded rational emotive behavioral therapy, which is pretty much the only sort of therapy i could ever stand. i hate therapists, almost as much as i hate thinking about my emotions. MOLLYCODDLING NONSENSE! but, i think most soldiers would respond to that type of therapy better than others. what do you think?
Dr. SELIGMAN: The teaching of resilience comes out of the history of cognitive therapy of depression. So starting about 30 years ago, people like Aaron Beck and Albert Ellis began to look at the catastrophic thoughts that people said to themselves when they were in very adverse situations, and often those thoughts were unrealistic.
So if you're in Iraq, for example, and you call your wife at home - this seems to be our first war in which you can make cell phone calls home - and she doesn't answer, you might think the most catastrophic thing possible: She's walked out on me.
So one of the things you teach people to do is, well, just wait a minute. That's the most catastrophic possibility. Now, what's the best possible scenario? Well, it might be that she's just taken the kids out for a walk. Okay, now, what's the most likely scenario? Well, we did have a fight yesterday. So she may have gone off to see her mother, but things are going to be all right.
So resilience begins by teaching soldiers, just as we have taught thousands of people, to recognize the most catastrophic things they say to themselves when bad events occur and to dispute them, to find the realistic causes of the bad events.
back when i was a young'un, i would get weirdly paranoid about some things generally, and depressed about the lady situation specifically, and i would spiral down to bad places. after i had a huge wake up call with johnny law, i forced myself to deal with it according to my dad's advice, which was pretty much, 'you're fucking up. fix it.' i forced myself to challenge my anxieties and pretty soon, those anxieties went away. that little incident changed my life and is probably the most formative event in my life.
well, that, and having to work for my dad for a few summers. i didn't really appreciate my dad until i had to work for him, but i came to find out real quick how hard my dad worked to get by. i still miss physical labor, and i enjoy getting to do it when i can, but nowadays the closest i can get to reliving those memories is listening to some golden oldies, which my dad's partner would always listen to on the jobsite.
i've been reliving those days in my head quite a bit lately, thanks to an awesome site i found on the innerwebs a few weeks ago. it's called garage punk, you absolutely must listen to the new podcast from mr a the barber. listen to the show! and maybe i'll go see the barber soon. it's been almost 3 weeks. i think i can make it to a month before i have to buy a new hat.
so i haven't been able to keep a coherent series of thoughts together lately... especially on the phone (sorry mom and dad, i hate phones). so i'm gonna leave this right here. the best way to get through this is to just focus on the here and now. hopefully i'll know what's next in a few months. if not, whatever. all i want is a nice place to live where i can spend time with my dog and get ready for the next phase of my life. i think i may know what i want to do when i grow up. and that's a feeling i never had before. no anxiety. it's nice.
now if only i could figure out women....
Dr. SELIGMAN: The teaching of resilience comes out of the history of cognitive therapy of depression. So starting about 30 years ago, people like Aaron Beck and Albert Ellis began to look at the catastrophic thoughts that people said to themselves when they were in very adverse situations, and often those thoughts were unrealistic.
So if you're in Iraq, for example, and you call your wife at home - this seems to be our first war in which you can make cell phone calls home - and she doesn't answer, you might think the most catastrophic thing possible: She's walked out on me.
So one of the things you teach people to do is, well, just wait a minute. That's the most catastrophic possibility. Now, what's the best possible scenario? Well, it might be that she's just taken the kids out for a walk. Okay, now, what's the most likely scenario? Well, we did have a fight yesterday. So she may have gone off to see her mother, but things are going to be all right.
So resilience begins by teaching soldiers, just as we have taught thousands of people, to recognize the most catastrophic things they say to themselves when bad events occur and to dispute them, to find the realistic causes of the bad events.
back when i was a young'un, i would get weirdly paranoid about some things generally, and depressed about the lady situation specifically, and i would spiral down to bad places. after i had a huge wake up call with johnny law, i forced myself to deal with it according to my dad's advice, which was pretty much, 'you're fucking up. fix it.' i forced myself to challenge my anxieties and pretty soon, those anxieties went away. that little incident changed my life and is probably the most formative event in my life.
well, that, and having to work for my dad for a few summers. i didn't really appreciate my dad until i had to work for him, but i came to find out real quick how hard my dad worked to get by. i still miss physical labor, and i enjoy getting to do it when i can, but nowadays the closest i can get to reliving those memories is listening to some golden oldies, which my dad's partner would always listen to on the jobsite.
i've been reliving those days in my head quite a bit lately, thanks to an awesome site i found on the innerwebs a few weeks ago. it's called garage punk, you absolutely must listen to the new podcast from mr a the barber. listen to the show! and maybe i'll go see the barber soon. it's been almost 3 weeks. i think i can make it to a month before i have to buy a new hat.
so i haven't been able to keep a coherent series of thoughts together lately... especially on the phone (sorry mom and dad, i hate phones). so i'm gonna leave this right here. the best way to get through this is to just focus on the here and now. hopefully i'll know what's next in a few months. if not, whatever. all i want is a nice place to live where i can spend time with my dog and get ready for the next phase of my life. i think i may know what i want to do when i grow up. and that's a feeling i never had before. no anxiety. it's nice.
now if only i could figure out women....
Sunday, August 1, 2010
peace is not an option
earlier in the week, as the details emerged of wikileaks' posting, i was more curious as to how the federales would react. i didn't have my hopes very high, but i was fairly pleased. i find the whole 'opsec' culture in the army quite tedious, to tell you the truth. there is a time and a place for secrecy, but the amount of information we keep secret is higher than i think it ought to be. warfare more closely resembles the chaotic aftermath of a natural disaster where limiting information flow hurts organizational performance, not the comfortable confines of a garrison environment. even in garrison, i rarely had access to secret information because of the infrastructure requirements. we do a much better job over here, obviously, in exchanging sensitive information.
what was once probably our greatest asset, namely the ability of junior leaders and troops on the ground to quickly read the situation on the ground and improvise and adapt to accomplish the mission, has been turned on it's head. our adversaries are manifestly better at turning the tactical situation on the ground into a strategic victory, regardless of the tactical outcome. part of this lies in the fact that they speak the language of the locals, and we of course are foreigners. the fact that we never spend more than a year on the ground, and when we do we roll around in massive armored vehicles wearing body armor and the like which serves, i'm sure, to strip us of our humanity in the eyes of the population we are striving to protect, cannot help matters much.
so what is to be done? i always thought it odd that we send units back to the united states before we've achieved victory. a deployment with an end date of 'UTC' would sink the whole volunteer army thing, but it would have the added benefit of curtailing the ambitions of chickenhawk politicians who take war a little less lightly than they should. something i think that would be reasonable, though, would be to deploy units to the same location every time. AfPak Hands is a pretty brilliant idea, but why not expand on the concept? units wouldn't spend the first several months of their deployments relearning their, ugh, 'battlespace.' the afghans, i would hope, would be more prone to believe our statements of our enduring support if they saw the same faces return. of course, this would mean that the majority of soldiers and leaders would have to remain with their units, but for the most part, i doubt this would cause an uproar. i'm sure many soldiers and their families would at least appreciate the stability that would afford.
in terms of initiative by junior leaders, well, there are two things i can think of. general mattis gets it. we've never learned to fight with the radios off. there is almost no unit out there that doesn't have a constant leash going back to the TOC. situational awareness is great, but the tendency to micromanage is always there. i have to wonder if it doesn't do more harm than good. i'd rather have soldiers in the field operating off of the commander's intent and their own judgment than someone miles away giving orders through a radio based on what the predator sees.
initiative won't get you very far without capable, competent and intelligent soldiers. we need them, and we need to pay them whatever it takes to get them to join. too expensive? then don't fight a war like this. having spent a little bit of my life in command, i can say that the drop in recruitment standards really hurt the quality of the army. that cohort was pretty sad. and for every disciplinary and medical issue i had with a soldier, it took an NCO to babysit them until they were gone, which took months.
add into that the army's very bureaucratic training methods. qualified with your weapon twice a year? you're good to go! nevermind that you still carry the thing like you don't know which way to point it. you want to do room clearing and detainee search procedures? where does that fit on your METL crosswalks? nevermind that the army hasn't even gotten your ARTEP transitioned over to CATS yet, let alone adopted the tasks for the contemporary operating environment. but we sure did learn how to set up our camo nets and emplace our chemical detectors, so i guess we're ready. peacetime training, until you get your mission, should revolve around three things: competence in your unit's core mission, functional high-intensity physical training and open-ended problem solving in stressful environments that replicate likely scenarios the unit will face. the only place that 'tasks, conditions and standards' should have is the first one.
but i've come a long way from the start of this post, and i need to get back to the point. i was pleased with the reaction of the government because i don't think they oversold the value of secrecy. in fact, they may have undersold it. as abu muqawama, josh foust, and i'm sure quite a few others have pointed out, julian assange didn't just endanger the lives of americans (though it will take a lot of time for the taliban to digest the information, and by then we won't be operating the same way anyway), he endangered the lives of afghans as well. i think it is worse for wikileaks to have removed the names of americans but not that afghans. the americans over there CHOSE to be over there in one way or another. we chose that fight, and to put our lives on the line. the afghan names posted by wikileaks never chose to live this war, but they're in it and i'm sure most of them are just trying to make it to the end with their families and their livelihoods in tact. that the people at wikileaks went through all of these documents, saw their names, and chose to do nothing to protect them, despite what we know about the taliban and their lack of humanity, is utterly unforgivable.
there is a role for the whistleblowers, the leakers, and even the loose-lipped bloggers out there. sometimes information is more valuable in the public domain, even when its release has negative consequences. it can serve to keep the government honest, the citizenry more informed about the true nature of war, or maybe just what daddy is up to. and while kant would say that mr. assange has done nothing immoral, those of us in the real world know that actions have consequences. releasing this information without protecting these afghans is incredibly callous and shows that mr. assange does not care about the means, he cares about the ends.
i'm angry, so i'm going to listen to some agnostic front.*
*i was going to get into my struggle as a libertarian, coming from a liberal family, of dealing with these wars. how i desperately want to help these people, and knowing how bloody and painful it is to even try, with little guarantee of success. how little i can do as one man to make a difference; how i've already spent a third of my life in the military and done nothing of consequence. i doubt that the ability of the taliban and al qaeda to do us any real harm can't be managed by better intelligence work and targeting. but i don't think i could put anything down that would be coherent, as different parts of my brain are still fighting it out on this one. that, and it's time to finish my laundry and call my folks. oh, and i'm lazy.
what was once probably our greatest asset, namely the ability of junior leaders and troops on the ground to quickly read the situation on the ground and improvise and adapt to accomplish the mission, has been turned on it's head. our adversaries are manifestly better at turning the tactical situation on the ground into a strategic victory, regardless of the tactical outcome. part of this lies in the fact that they speak the language of the locals, and we of course are foreigners. the fact that we never spend more than a year on the ground, and when we do we roll around in massive armored vehicles wearing body armor and the like which serves, i'm sure, to strip us of our humanity in the eyes of the population we are striving to protect, cannot help matters much.
so what is to be done? i always thought it odd that we send units back to the united states before we've achieved victory. a deployment with an end date of 'UTC' would sink the whole volunteer army thing, but it would have the added benefit of curtailing the ambitions of chickenhawk politicians who take war a little less lightly than they should. something i think that would be reasonable, though, would be to deploy units to the same location every time. AfPak Hands is a pretty brilliant idea, but why not expand on the concept? units wouldn't spend the first several months of their deployments relearning their, ugh, 'battlespace.' the afghans, i would hope, would be more prone to believe our statements of our enduring support if they saw the same faces return. of course, this would mean that the majority of soldiers and leaders would have to remain with their units, but for the most part, i doubt this would cause an uproar. i'm sure many soldiers and their families would at least appreciate the stability that would afford.
in terms of initiative by junior leaders, well, there are two things i can think of. general mattis gets it. we've never learned to fight with the radios off. there is almost no unit out there that doesn't have a constant leash going back to the TOC. situational awareness is great, but the tendency to micromanage is always there. i have to wonder if it doesn't do more harm than good. i'd rather have soldiers in the field operating off of the commander's intent and their own judgment than someone miles away giving orders through a radio based on what the predator sees.
initiative won't get you very far without capable, competent and intelligent soldiers. we need them, and we need to pay them whatever it takes to get them to join. too expensive? then don't fight a war like this. having spent a little bit of my life in command, i can say that the drop in recruitment standards really hurt the quality of the army. that cohort was pretty sad. and for every disciplinary and medical issue i had with a soldier, it took an NCO to babysit them until they were gone, which took months.
add into that the army's very bureaucratic training methods. qualified with your weapon twice a year? you're good to go! nevermind that you still carry the thing like you don't know which way to point it. you want to do room clearing and detainee search procedures? where does that fit on your METL crosswalks? nevermind that the army hasn't even gotten your ARTEP transitioned over to CATS yet, let alone adopted the tasks for the contemporary operating environment. but we sure did learn how to set up our camo nets and emplace our chemical detectors, so i guess we're ready. peacetime training, until you get your mission, should revolve around three things: competence in your unit's core mission, functional high-intensity physical training and open-ended problem solving in stressful environments that replicate likely scenarios the unit will face. the only place that 'tasks, conditions and standards' should have is the first one.
but i've come a long way from the start of this post, and i need to get back to the point. i was pleased with the reaction of the government because i don't think they oversold the value of secrecy. in fact, they may have undersold it. as abu muqawama, josh foust, and i'm sure quite a few others have pointed out, julian assange didn't just endanger the lives of americans (though it will take a lot of time for the taliban to digest the information, and by then we won't be operating the same way anyway), he endangered the lives of afghans as well. i think it is worse for wikileaks to have removed the names of americans but not that afghans. the americans over there CHOSE to be over there in one way or another. we chose that fight, and to put our lives on the line. the afghan names posted by wikileaks never chose to live this war, but they're in it and i'm sure most of them are just trying to make it to the end with their families and their livelihoods in tact. that the people at wikileaks went through all of these documents, saw their names, and chose to do nothing to protect them, despite what we know about the taliban and their lack of humanity, is utterly unforgivable.
there is a role for the whistleblowers, the leakers, and even the loose-lipped bloggers out there. sometimes information is more valuable in the public domain, even when its release has negative consequences. it can serve to keep the government honest, the citizenry more informed about the true nature of war, or maybe just what daddy is up to. and while kant would say that mr. assange has done nothing immoral, those of us in the real world know that actions have consequences. releasing this information without protecting these afghans is incredibly callous and shows that mr. assange does not care about the means, he cares about the ends.
i'm angry, so i'm going to listen to some agnostic front.*
*i was going to get into my struggle as a libertarian, coming from a liberal family, of dealing with these wars. how i desperately want to help these people, and knowing how bloody and painful it is to even try, with little guarantee of success. how little i can do as one man to make a difference; how i've already spent a third of my life in the military and done nothing of consequence. i doubt that the ability of the taliban and al qaeda to do us any real harm can't be managed by better intelligence work and targeting. but i don't think i could put anything down that would be coherent, as different parts of my brain are still fighting it out on this one. that, and it's time to finish my laundry and call my folks. oh, and i'm lazy.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
downtime misery
 |
| kuwait life |
so no theme song to listen to this time, but if you care, google-fy 'vision of disorder - downtime misery.' i don't even know if it's on the youtubes, as a lot of the music i listen to isn't, but it's pretty sweet... if you happen to like music that makes your ears bleed.
i had thought that my pre-deployment training was specifically designed to make everyone want to get to a warzone as quickly as possible, but then i got to kuwait. now i'd spent a year there before, so i knew what i was getting into. 120+ degree heat and gusting winds does suck, but not as bad as not having any wind, so i could deal. i just didn't expect to spend 3 days waiting for a plane. but at least i had a relatively cool tent and lots of green bean coffee, a luxury i knew i wouldn't have here.
and then i got to afghanistan. it made kuwait look like a model of german efficiency. now i understand the demands on the mobility air guys here, but you'd think someone would've thought to expand the pax terminals by now. it was like the wild west, which is odd considering we've been here for almost a decade. but, i managed to get a few hookups, and even some for two soldiers who were left hanging, and got down to my little corner of afghanistan in short order.
and now my week of having nothing much to do but drag my bags around, sleep, eat and hunt for internet access has turned into a frantic effort to inventory equipment and figure out just what it is exactly i'll be doing here. one bit of news, not only do i get to play commander and sign for all of our property, i get to be the personnel guy too. so it looks like i'll be a one man ALOC, so i'll have to work on my battle cry, a la my friend alicia.
so it's just about time to try to finish my inventories before the deadline to sign the property book (3 days for me, 30 days is the rule in the states). and it's mail day, so i'll be busy.
so i probably won't have time to push out another post today, as i'm going to be pretty busy. i'll probably restrict myself to posting on sunday, at least until i'm in the groove. plus, i need a wireless keyboard, as my touchpad on this laptop is super sensitive and my meaty hands keep eating paragraphs whole, which is pretty frustrating.
one thing before i go though: wapo is reporting 2 american soldiers have disappeared and may have been captured by the taliban. hopefully they manage to find a way back to us safely.
- robert e lee -
Sunday, July 11, 2010
this blog is live!
going to the 'stan in a few days, so i figured i'd start blogging again.
i'm actually looking forward to it. i did volunteer for this, after all. i've missed a few deployments through a combination of bad luck and bad timing. i'd like to think that's the same reason that i haven't flown in 3 years, too (hence the blog name). my reason for volunteering is that i just want to feel like i've accomplished something during my time in the service. my first deployment was pretty worthless, and watching all my friends deploy while i was back stateside was pretty rough. i also have some friends who were pretty badly maimed, and they're still in, fighting the army bureaucracy to stay in and keep doing far more than their fair share. so it's high time i did something, too.
i'm not going to divulge where i am, or what my mission is, or who i am. i hope that you all respect that. not that anybody is reading anyway. i just want someplace to vent my thoughts, feelings, tasteless jokes and even more tasteless music choices into the void. when i blogged before, it was cathartic in the same way, though i KNOW nobody read any of that stuff. but then my command wore on, i got a puppy, and i needed to get a life, so i ran out of time to blog.
i'm hoping this blog will be more upbeat than the last one, and i hope my friends and family appreciate the occasional update. the 420 characters on facebook isn't quite sufficient to capture what i want to say. so here i am, all up in your internets.
i'll be posting my occasional 2 cents on my view of strategic and operational aspects of the war, the news of the day back home from my own quirky viewpoints, perhaps some crossfit-related stuff, and, of course, inappropriate humor and music, ala attackerman. i've found that putting thoughts on paper, digital or otherwise, is a good way to refine and organize my thoughts. i'm certainly no starbuck, but i figured i'd at least try to emulate him a bit. we can't have all the contractors have all the good blogs, can we? nothing here will approach the quality or the professionalism of those guys. the best i can hope for is to match gsgf, minus all the super-hawt girlie pics.
so that's it for this post. i gotta go before this touchpad eats any more of my thoughts and i give up. so i'm going off to war, and you know what?
i'm actually looking forward to it. i did volunteer for this, after all. i've missed a few deployments through a combination of bad luck and bad timing. i'd like to think that's the same reason that i haven't flown in 3 years, too (hence the blog name). my reason for volunteering is that i just want to feel like i've accomplished something during my time in the service. my first deployment was pretty worthless, and watching all my friends deploy while i was back stateside was pretty rough. i also have some friends who were pretty badly maimed, and they're still in, fighting the army bureaucracy to stay in and keep doing far more than their fair share. so it's high time i did something, too.
i'm not going to divulge where i am, or what my mission is, or who i am. i hope that you all respect that. not that anybody is reading anyway. i just want someplace to vent my thoughts, feelings, tasteless jokes and even more tasteless music choices into the void. when i blogged before, it was cathartic in the same way, though i KNOW nobody read any of that stuff. but then my command wore on, i got a puppy, and i needed to get a life, so i ran out of time to blog.
i'm hoping this blog will be more upbeat than the last one, and i hope my friends and family appreciate the occasional update. the 420 characters on facebook isn't quite sufficient to capture what i want to say. so here i am, all up in your internets.
i'll be posting my occasional 2 cents on my view of strategic and operational aspects of the war, the news of the day back home from my own quirky viewpoints, perhaps some crossfit-related stuff, and, of course, inappropriate humor and music, ala attackerman. i've found that putting thoughts on paper, digital or otherwise, is a good way to refine and organize my thoughts. i'm certainly no starbuck, but i figured i'd at least try to emulate him a bit. we can't have all the contractors have all the good blogs, can we? nothing here will approach the quality or the professionalism of those guys. the best i can hope for is to match gsgf, minus all the super-hawt girlie pics.
so that's it for this post. i gotta go before this touchpad eats any more of my thoughts and i give up. so i'm going off to war, and you know what?
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